The last few weeks

I haven't been great with keeping this blog up to date but i do want to continue it so I'm going to have a huge re-cap now. My last weeks on the ashram were great, i knew it was all coming to an end and i decided to really cherish the time i had left. Katherin left and a new volunteer came called Nina, from Switzerland. I went on a week's holiday to Kerela and visited Kovalom and Kannyakumari. I loved my time on the beach, it was a good time for me because it enabled me to really think about the ashram and all the girls. I missed them a lot and was very excited about returning and spending my last 5 days with them. I knew that i was ready to leave and that i felt that i had had enough time on the ashram but that didn't make it any easier when it came to saying goodbye. Some of the high-school girls tried to persuade me to stay and there was an awful moment when i was with about 6 of them studying and talking about me leaving and they all started crying. It took a huge amount of effort on my part not to join them but i knew i had to be strong, plus the fact that i knew i was going to be a mess on the actual morning i left! Preevita and Maggie wrote me the sweetest note and drew some very cute pictures for me and Gowsalya also gave me a letter that i will keep forever. I felt very sad to leave Sugunya and Gowsalya as i really became close to both of them. I'm glad that they became friends and i am sure that Sugunya will look after Gowsalya and make sure that she's OK. My last weekend was nice as i was there on my own as Nina had gone on a PTA weekend. I gave my presents to the girls after prayer on the Saturday (ink pens and ink for the older girls and books for the younger ones). They were all so grateful and it brought tears to my eyes giving them out, it really hit home then that i was leaving. My last bedtime was hard, saying goodnight to the girls for the last time was very sad. I knew i would see them in the morning but bedtime was my favourite time and i will miss it a lot. I didn't sleep much on the last night and when Bala arrived it all seemed far too real. I said my goodbyes but thinking back they were too rushed, i was crying and i regret not giving Sugunya and Gowsalya a huge hug. All the small girls formed a line and were waving and shouting their goodbyes, i waved madly from the car and before i knew it i was out of the ashram and on the way to the airport. I can see Sugunya's and Gowsalya's face now so clearly, i really hope they are OK. Having now had some time to reflect on my time there i realise that i am so lucky to have met such amazing children and it's an experience that i will never forget. The girls faces are still very much etched on my memory and i hope that they won't fade. I know that it was time for me to move on but my heart is still with the girls on Madurai Seva Ashram.